out of focus

I’m not sure you see me as I am and I’m afraid one day I’m going to be found out, you are going to know me and then leave me.

I am hiding in plain sight, a bundle of nerves held together with a handful of pills, holding my breath and waiting for the worst to come.

No one sees me this way, not even you, and sometimes when I look in the mirror I don’t even recognize myself anymore.

This was written for Tri-Writing with Maya Stein, 3 lines for 21 days.